Tip Of The Hat Tuesday: Failure Edition

As I progress in my knowledge of and experience with crochet, here are some things I have learned: You Can't Rush Art, and I am NOT ready to go without a pattern.

My husband's colleague has a son who is about two weeks older than our daughter. He texts me one day and says I want to pick up a little something for Jordan's first birthday." I, in my infinite wisdom say "I'll just make him something! What do they like?" Now my husband hadn't been at this job very long at this point and could hardly tell me this family's last name, let alone their hobbies and interests. After a bit of pondering I had a stroke of "genius" and decided obviously this little guy needed a beanie that looked like a lobster (which may or may not have anything to do with the fact. And then my husband tells me the kid's birthday is the following day...

Commence Operation: Wing It

I won't bore you with the details on how this monstrosity came to be, but even on my daughter's average sized noggin, it was basically a floppy-clawed lobster yarmulke with ear flaps.

Buggles knew it was foolish and did NOT want to be seen wearing it, so these are the best photos I was able to get. 

 

In the end my husband, seeing my frustration and disappointment, ended up going to Target and buying a sweet Batman shirt. Then two days later I am looking for the thing thinking I can at least re-use the sweet buttons and find that it's missing. So I ask if he's seen it. He had GIVEN it to his colleague as well. There was little I could do besides bury my face (which was now about the same shade of red as the hat) and be glad I hadn't ever met this guy. I just imagine him trying to look grateful when he's really wondering why this weirdo is handing him a bag stuffed with the equivalent of macaroni art to hang on the refrigerator... 

Why am I sharing a failed project, you ask? I want to hear about your most ridiculous craft fails, cakewrecks, and Pinterest disasters. Come on, commiserate with me here. I'm sure it will make me feel better.